I went for a walk this morning. I had to tell myself that I was only going to walk, no running and that I wouldn't even have to go the usual 2 miles if I didn't feel like it. It took an hour of arguing with myself to get out the door, but at least I finally got outside. My favorite part of walking is the communication and revelation from God. I got some clarity this morning.
I began to think about Lot's wife. Genesis 19 tells the story; Lot and his family were told to leave Sodom and not look back. However, Lot's wife at some point just had to turn around. And she became a pillar of salt. Kind of a strange thing to think about at 7:00 a.m. But this is what I got from it:
Looking back can stop you from moving forward. It can paralyze and immobilize you. The New Living Translation says "run for your lives." (yes, I noticed the version I looked up when I got home said RUN!) it would be very difficult to run if your not looking in front of you. And probably dangerous as well. This is where I have been for the past 8 months. A frozen pillar of salt; full of purpose and meant for Gods kingdom, but stuck looking behind me. When I would go out and run my thoughts were things like: "when I left Florida I had worked up to running half a mile, now I can barely run 60 seconds." "I lost 80 pounds in 6 months, now I've gained half of it back." "I can't get back to where I was." I focused on all the things I had in the past: a personal trainer, a gym membership, friends that noticed all the work I was doing, a church I could walk (or run) to. I had no motivation to work because I felt like I was starting from behind. I couldn't see progress because I had already accomplished these things and should have been farther than I was. Looking backwards had me stuck.
I realized this morning that I can't do that. I can't think about what I weighed 8 months ago or how far I could run or how much I've lost while being stuck in the past. It's time to look forward. What i did last year is not that important. What I do now is what matters. Looking forward, moving forward, focusing on now; that's what will bring accomplishments. So right now, where I'm at, regardless of the past, I noticed that yes I get tired after a 1 minute jog but my heart rate also goes back to normal piercer quick. Right now, I can do week 2 of "Run Your Butt Off" (a great book for new runners!) I can see progress today. And if I move forward, I will see progress tomorrow.
Take a moment and examine where your at. Are you stuck looking at the past? Wishing you were back at a certain point in life? Stop. Your life isn't over yet. Turn around. Move forward. Do something today to make a change.
Today, I did the whole 2 miles that I usually do. And I ran 5 one minute sections during my walk. I accomplished more than I expected when I walked out my door this morning. That's what matters. That's what I'll hold on to. No more looking back.
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