I'm doing somewhat better today. SOMEWHAT! Praise God for HIM - in my weakness He is strong. I heard a message today on fasting and the importance of fasting the thing in your life that gives you the most trouble. It was enough to get me back on track. Monday I made it through the day with no sugar. It was extremely hard the whole day, but I made it. (Thank you Jesus!) Today was different - we had a Pastor's lunch to attend and they served fast food for lunch. I was so proud of myself; I gave my brownie away! It really wasn't easy - I wanted to eat badly, but I'm trying to stay on track. It's time to realize the seriousness of my eating struggles. I felt good all day that I had made it over that test - until I realized that I had eaten the chicken sandwich! Hello!!! Buns are loaded with sugar! I was so upset I bought Burger King for dinner and ate that bun too! I know, I know - that's not what I should have done. It was just an excuse to do what I wanted to do. And pure laziness, since it was my night to cook and I didn't want to. Sorry! I'll just keep on going. So often I simply don't know what to do. I feel like I will never get free of this. But I know I can never give up. If I give up I will die. Maybe not immediately, but at some point - my food habits are killing me.
I so desparately want to be free, but I just don't seem to be able to figure out how to resist on a regular basis - for the rest of my life. Help me JESUS!!
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