I don't want to

Wednesday wasn't anything special. I did OK. I ate sugar free oatmeal for breakfast, a chicken breast for lunch, ONE slice of cheese pizza (I know, crust is not good.) I made a roast in the crock pot for dinner, with red potatoes and green beans. Also, I didn't feel like exercising - my back and foot were hurting. But I needed to do SOMETHING, so I played tennis on my daughters WII for 30 minutes.

The good thing is I started having dedicated prayer time Wednesday morning. It was wonderful! I spent about 45 minutes with the Lord. I've missed that. We live in a very small house now and I always feel like there's no room to move around and I don't want to disturb anyone if I get loud. I feel very trapped when I can only pace in a small area. That's just me and you may wonder why I'm even discussing prayer on a weight and health blog. It''s because I think my relationship to God is key for success. See, I've tried on my own a bunch and I'm still fat. I know I can't do it on my own. But I believe God will strengthen me and see me through. Why hasn't He yet? Because I keep taking it back - throwing a temper trantrum like a little kid and demanding my own way. Prayer is important because it draws you closer to God, helps remove stress, and passes time.

Today went smoothly, but I can see where I'm starting to push the limits - I tasted spaghetti sauce that I knew had sugar in it and used salad dressing with sugar. I know it's not big things and for most people it wouldn't matter. But for me, it's like the start of a rebellion. I know how I work. Also, i just realized that I didn't work out today and it's 10 pm and I just don't want to work out. That's not the attitude I need to have. I thank God that I can look at myself honestly so I'm aware of where I'm heading if I don't get in check. Being honest (NOT CONDEMNING) is a good step toward any type of self improvement.

I'm going to lay down now. Hopefully I can jump back in tomorrow. I need to remember why it's so important to make this journey.